vague greeting cards

But why?

1) These are literary masterpieces, painstakingly crafted by yours truly, a computer science major.

2) They're perfect for if you're a bit too busy to write a handwritten note, or to send to people that aren't quite strangers but also not close enough for you to be comfortably emotional, or when your overwhelming love for your recipient has spilled into the realm of ironically affectionate aloofness.